Billions of people, trillions of stories and infinite expressions. Diverse people, the same oxygen is what they breathe but yet each story of life untold with a twist and spice of its own. Some bad and some good, but one thing does hit the minds, everything did happen for good. Believe it or not; that is true. A loss of reputation or something dear to our heart like self-esteem causes a pain which is quite inexplainable. The feeling or the sorrow cannot be simply put into words for one may not understand even if the most mawkish words were used. But understanding happens only when an individual puts himself/herself into the other person’s shoes and look at the world from their eyes. At that moment, everything begins to make sense.
Too often, we humans have the tendency to get into a conclusion. Some may perceive an extreme form of good deed as a bad one and the others may do the vice-versa. But whatever the case maybe, we judge. There is a famous saying, ‘that which you witness is a lie, that which you hear is a lie; only a deep understanding after investigation is true’. When I was quite young, I didn’t understand whatever this meant (I don’t think many children do), how come something I see could not be true because I see it. Well, the apparent meanings are what struck the psyche all the time. But of course, now all of us know what this actually means. The biggest problem of the entire nation of humans is their tendency to judge people by their looks, apparent deeds or the so called facts prevailing around about them. Seriously, fellow humans; facts of a person? Where are we living? What have we come to?
A stranger comes up and tells that XYZ is so and so; and you just believe them blindly. Why? Have we ever thought about that which we are talking about before starting our conversation? Gossip is made extremely lustrous these days that it doesn’t seem wrong anymore. But, little do some know about the consequences a gossip or rumour could create in one’s life. Digging the past and misunderstanding the whole issue of existence of an individual reduces a noble human being to a downtrodden individual in just a fraction of seconds. One minute of talk is enough to destroy the reputation of a person that he/she has strove to build since years. Is this what our forefathers taught us?
Talking isn’t bad. Personally, I myself am a talkative person; you can even call me Ms. Chatter Prattler. But, talking about someone else is worse than anything else. In the words of Islam, backbiting is equal to eating a dead brother’s flesh! On hearing that, don’t you feel like as though someone is pricking your sense with a highly pointed needle? I am no noble human being, none of us are perfect. At some point of our life, we are bound to talk wrong about someone else or just gossip about them, but we, as true believers or just a human being need to consider the consequences of the words we utter. Words are precious; once thrown out; they can never be taken back. They cannot be retrieved, but they can be recycled; only if you take a step down your ego ladder and proceed to ask forgiveness to the person whom you may have hurt directly or indirectly.
Before thinking about the ways you can stop talking behind someone’s back; we need to know what distinguishes between a normal talk and a gossip. Before uttering anything about a person, ask yourself ‘if the person whom I am going to talk about was to sit right in front of me now, will I be able to say that which I am willing to say right now?’ That one simple question can change the whole way you converse with people. As I wrote above, each and every person in this world has a story of their own. We do not know the perfect reasoning or consequence a person has to deal with; for we are mere observers and they are the ones who are living their hearts out. With all the social media around us; sleeping at night has become a chore and some of us do it only because not doing so would cause serious health risks. Otherwise, most of our good times would be spent in knowing or in other words stalking other’s lives and trust me; if you find anything good about that individual, you may forget that in a few days but if something close to bad seems to pop out; that is enough to fuel the conversation for one whole week when even the worse of writers become great storytellers and guess what; they sound so factual!
Communication is essential. It is that characteristic of ours which differentiates us from laggards. We need a drive in our life and to achieve the goal we must communicate. We meet people every day and in the extremely inter-connected world we live in, we have got the opportunity to be best buddies even with the person living under the oceans (mind the hyperbole, nobody lives of course, or do they?). The point that matters is the subject on which you ‘converse’. Weather it may be workplace, school, market, party or wherever; you just have to remember the principles you have set in your lives and should always remember to put yourselves in the shoes of the person whom you are talking about. The other individual (the victim in here) may be an ethical or a complete unethical person; but that does not matter, for he/she also holds onto a soul like you do and he/she also has heart within which cringes on hearing the negative remarks of the people around him/her. It’s not just women (as popularly claimed)these days who talk a lot and gossip A LOT, it is men as well, sort of like a trend eh?
Be careful with your tongue, for it either makes you compassionate or it may betray you. Use it wisely and remember to begin the process of recycling if you have ever at all thrown some litter out there. Wish you all happy days ahead! Talk wise and share a happy slice of your life with someone close to your heart! Do not waste your short life here by dwelling in others’ lives. Care and share but never betray.